The month of October holds significant importance as it is widely recognized as LGBTQIA+ History Month. This celebration embodies not only the acknowledgment of progress and achievement within the community but for me personally, also represents a journey of self-discovery and acceptance as a queer athlete.Â
Cassidy Puleo
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Before coming to Cal, being gay was something I was not able to celebrate. I felt the need to hide this part of my identity because it didn't fit with the person who I was trying to portray as myself. I struggled with the idea that those around me would become uncomfortable with this "change," so I vowed to keep this part of myself hidden away. I kept my hair as long as possible, dressed in clothes I didn't feel comfortable in, and forced myself to be someone who I definitely was not, all in the hopes of keeping my sexuality a secret. I struggled to find a community that I felt allowed me to be unapologetically myself, and it wasn't until my freshman year at Cal that I was able to do so.Â
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I was excited to come to Berkeley, a place known for its acceptance, and start from scratch. I was in a completely new town with completely new people, and I finally felt like I was able to create whatever identity I wanted for myself, free from any constraints which had previously been in my way. I was no longer tied down by expectations or false identities like I had been before, and finally felt like I was able to express myself the way I wanted, and not the way people around me wanted.Â
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My teammates and coaching staff also played a huge role in my journey of self-discovery and acceptance through their unconditional support. For the first time in my life, I felt like I had friends who truly loved me for me and was surrounded by people who wanted nothing but the best for me. Having a head coach and teammates who also identify as part of the LGBTQIA+ community gave me a feeling of normalcy that I had been craving for so long, I no longer felt like an outsider. Cal Athletics has also given me a sense of belonging within Bears United, a club dedicated to fostering a safe community space for LGBTQIA+ athletes, which I am very proud to now be Co-President of.
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Looking back on my personal growth, it is surreal to see the strides I've made in such a short amount of time. I am forever grateful for the communities, friends, and teammates Cal Athletics has given me, and for their continued support and acceptance through my journey of self-discovery. I cannot stress the importance of creating safe and accepting environments and I hope that through sharing my experiences, I am able to empower and inspire those grappling with their own sense of identity.
Cassidy Puleo is a junior backfielder for the Cal Field Hockey team.
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